"i'm glad i don't live where i used to...it's snowing there right now...and that's not a nice way to wake up on the sidewalk!"

"i don't understand why nothing happens when i axe him?"

"i tell him and he does it right away!"

"but when i axe him all i get is silence!"

"why is it that when i axe him nothing happens but when i just tell him he does it?"

might want to tell instead of axe...might work wonders...!?